One day at a time.....

One day at a time....

Ever since I turned 40, I have been living my life guided by one simple motto: one day at a time.

Living in the moment and trying to enjoy it has always been something that came easy to me - but even more so after some of my scary infertility experiences. 

Being more present to people and really focusing on the here and now is something I have really been working on the past few years. 

Believe me, I'm the first one to admit that my phone is attached to my hand and it's hard for me to put it down. 

But I'm also the first one who is relieved if the plane (every now and then) does not have wifi (like right now!) so I can unplug for awhile.

Where did my desire to live one day at a time come from? When did I become better at living in the moment and taking things as they come? 

Or is it a skill I have had all along and I just called it something else?

Looking back, I suppose I have been a spontaneous person most of my life. Growing up as the youngest child (those 12 stubborn minutes have got to count for something) I was well known for my fun loving, slightly rebellious, and, at times, attention seeking nature. 

Someone had to be the "baby" of the family and I still wear that title proudly. Maybe too proudly at times.

Using it as an excuse can only get you so far....

I am 100% sure that my parents worried about me growing up way more than they worried about my responsible and brilliant older sisters.

Don't get me wrong - we all worked hard, got good grades, and made my parents proud.  

We all had hobbies we enjoyed and passions we explored.

But I can guarantee that I am the only Goebel Girl whose kindergarten report card (and probably most of them after that) said "does not keep hands to herself" and "talks too much to her neighbors".

What can I say? Social might as well be my middle name.  Being impulsive and talkative and a little ADD (before that was a diagnosis) never got me into too much trouble.

Growing up, I was rewarded for being cute or goofy or funny. I was the comic relief people needed - always ready with a story or a way to distract them from feeling bad. God forbid anyone sit in that negative space for too long -- "people like me" (thanks Dad for that!) can't stand that. 

I never did anything risky or scary or illegal. In fact, I'm probably a goodie two shoes compared to most.

But I did a really good job distracting people around me - and maybe myself - from worrying about what could go wrong and focusing on what could go right or on right now. 

Even as a kid, I wanted to focus on the positive. I did not want to worry about what could be, I wanted to focus on what was. 

I have had this internal debate going on in my head for a while now -- is saying that I am living "one day at a time" just an excuse to "fly by the seat of my pants" or is it actually evolved, present moment, be here now consciousness?

I'd like to think I am a fairly evolved, philosophical, and grounded person but here's a good example...

I showed up at the airport one day and was checking my bags. When the skycap said "two bags to Tucson" and my response was "if you say so". You should have seen the look on his face.  This could be a sign of a zen like approach to life or the sign of total disorganized and chaotic  living.

(Note to self and you, dear reader: probably not the best thing to say at the airport but he blew it off and my bags and I made it to Arizona.)

I'd like to think that the skycap story proves that I live in the moment. What choice do I really have? I live out of a suitcase and some times don't know what city I am in when I wake up.

I have to do it one day at a time or the stress would overwhelm me.

I breathe in, I breathe out, I enjoy the ride, I love the people I meet and the work that I do. 

I say yes to big things (leaving my job at Nordstrom after 8 years) and yes to small things (sure, I'll blog for 30 days) and I do the best I can. 

Most of all, I try to live each day knowing I won't get a chance to live it again. 

But it can only be one day at a time.

I can't relive yesterday or worry about tomorrow. There is honestly not enough space in my room for that.

Zen like? Irresponsible?

Relaxed? Reckless?

I can't really say but I do know that this one day at a time thing has worked for me so far....why stop now?

One day at a time.....